Rockinscotland.

Located in a most unlikely spot (a brick strip mall next to a liquor store and a Car-X) you'll find the home of the most indulgent breakfast food that I have ever witnessed. Honestly, it seems like everything on the menu is either stuffed with cream cheese, drenched in vanilla bean custard, or dripping with some other heart-stopping but delicious concoction. Take, for example, the taffy apple crepes, which are piled with pecans, apple slices, and caramel sauce. Yum. And the portion sizes? Huge. You'll definitely be taking something home, so make sure you are open to eating cinnamon roll french toast for dinner. Oh yeah- they have lunch food, too. Psh.

The window display says it all; old-fashioned gas pumps, skeleton heads, viking helmets, gold ankle boots, and bowler hats are only some of the wonders you'll find in Hollywood Mirror. This vintage-meets-punk boutique leads you through the decades on a crazy, colorful ride. You move from Look magazines to bright green roller skates to Knight Rider lunchboxes to neon trucker hats, all without batting an eyelid. There's even a whole rack devoted to Golden Girl-esque sequined tops. Hollywood Mirror is definitely a must if you're into ridiculousness of all sorts which, of course, I am. I mean, how can you walk past a place that has a Mr. T doll and not go in?

I went to Owsley's one Halloween. I don't know if it was the Grateful Dead cover band playing or what, but the place was packed with young hippies on drugs which, for an observer, can be pretty fun. The place itself is kind of weird- it's too big for itself, with weird carpeted, dark, empty corners to hide in. The size, however, is a plus when it comes to the awesome ginormous patio, which is almost as big as the bar area itself. Maybe it was the insanely strong drinks, but I felt a positive, fun vibe at this place and, hippie or not, I think I'd go back.

I just love this place because they filmed the "nobody leaves this place without singing the blues" scene from "Adventures in Babysitting" here. And ALSO the scene from "A League of Their Own" when Marla Hooch serenades the bar. Legendary.

In the middle of dingy River Grove, IL lies an island paradise called...Hala Kahiki. Straight out of the 1970's, this place is a trip. Huge wooden tiki gods watch you as you sip multicolored cocktails in rooms lit by hanging bunches of electric bananas. When it comes to the menu, they don't play games. There are about ten pages of cocktails you can choose from, including "couples" cocktails that come in huge bowls with 18" straws. You CAN order a beer, but don't expect the lei'd and saronged waitresses to be happy about it. This place was the greatest- I sipped my Kokomo as my date tried to calculate how much blow was done off of various surfaces of the place throughout the years. It was just the right combination of kitsch and sleaze that makes me want to go running back. Mahalo, Hala Kahiki. Mahalo.

The Upsides:
ALL YOU CAN EAT! And it's not some gross buffet- it's all made fresh right in front of you. I had 3 maki rolls, 3 nigiri, and a spring roll. Yes, I am a beast.

The Downsides:
Saxophone versions of "My Heart Will Go On" playing in the background. The waitresses either hated me for ordering so much food or just plain hated their lives. I called in the afternoon to make a reservation and they wouldn't take it, saying that I could just walk in. When I got there that night, I had to wait 30 mins. Bullshit.

Would I return? Hells yeah. I'm a cheap bastard who likes to stuff her face.

The Japan Centre is a restaurant/supermarket/bookstore that specializes in (surprise!) everything Japanese. From wasabi peas to pickled vegetables to the latest edition of Japanese Cosmo, you'll find it all here. This place is great because you can pop in, grab a few packs of freshly-made sushi for about £2 or £3 each, then sit down and eat it for a third of the price of a real restaurant. And you know that the food is pretty damn authentic because the Japan Centre is not only run by Japanese people, but it is also always packed with Japanese customers. So whether you're stocking up on sake or munching on some california rolls, you know that it's the real thing and it's goooooooood.

My friends who live in Crouch End have wandered from curry house to curry house, trying to find the best one. When they went to Neyas, they knew the search was over. Not only is the food delicious and unique but, depending on what you get, it can also be super cheap. You can get a starter for as little as 2 quid and all the basic curries cost a fiver. Neyas is also BYOB with no corkage fee, so you can essentially get a starter, main course, and your tipple of choice for just £7. The only downside is we had to wait a little bit too long for our food, especially as we were one of only two tables of people there. But the courtesy of the waiters (opening doors for you, bringing you hot towels) made up for that. Try the lamb shacute. Delicious.

I visited their Soho location, which apparently is MUCH Smaller than the one in Shoreditch. It was pretty cool, though. Very colorful and funky with a strong 70s vibe. Prices were reasonable and it's always cool to know you're buying a one-of-a-kind piece. The thing I liked most about it was that it felt more like a high street shop; it didn't have that creepy, you're-probably-buying-a-dead-person's-clothes feeling to it that many vintage stores have. I couldn't find anything that I personally would buy, but that wouldn't stop me from recommending it. Next time, I'm going to the HUGE one...

The Photographer's Gallery was definitely a nice break from the hectic atmosphere of Oxford Street. Come here with your shopping, grab a coffee and a cake, chill out, and peruse the photos. It's the perfect size gallery to just pop in for twenty minutes or so and it's totally unintimidating, as well. You don't need to be an art snob and nobody's gonna glare at you if you pass up the donation box. And the gift shop had some pretty cool cameras (like those crazy fisheye ones). Definitely check this place out if you're desperate for some quiet in the middle of a big city.

Andersonville is...how do I put this?...very...gay. Which is great! In my opinion, any neighborhood where there are gay couples happily walking around holding hands must be a pretty friendly and welcoming place to be. The area itself is very cute. The Clark Street "downtown" area is a pretty happenin' area with lots of great ethnic restaurants, a bunch of very cool (and very expensive) home decorating stores, and some thrift shops. There are even a couple of bars thrown in for good measure. And there are barely any big chain stores/restaurants here, either, which is great. The residential area is lovely, with gorgeous, tree-lined streets and houses that range from greystones to Victorians. Overall, Andersonville isn't a huge party spot, but it's a nice, laid-back, settle-down-here-with-your-dog-and-gay/straight-partner kinda place.

There are actually three Brown Elephant stores; two in the city and one in the 'burbs. This one is pretty cool simply because it is located in an old theater/music hall and it's really creepy looking. Other than that, it's pretty much your typical thrift shop. I'm not much into wearing people's old clothes, so I always go there in search of furniture. You can get some decent stuff there- couches for $70 and the like. I've never found anything mind-blowing, but I value the simple pleasures in life; Huey Lewis' "Sports" on vinyl for $1 made my day.

You can tell that Andersonville is very gay-friendly because Hamburger Mary's is as camp as can be. The bathroom is covered in Marilyn Monroe photos, they have dishes with names like The Guacamole B.J. and Mary Tyler-S'mores, and they give you your check in a high-heeled shoe! Fabulous. They also have all sorts of crazy events going on throughout the week, from karaoke night to visits by cabaret singers to LGBT Soap Opera performances. There's always something worth checking out. P.S. Mary's is also a microbrewery, so it's not ALL pink drinks with frilly umbrellas over there!

My review for the Beacon will be in the form of two haikus. Enjoy.

Cheap tequila shots
but jukebox stole my quarters.
Bartender was rad.

Hoegaarden on tap
but I was dumb and drank crap.
Yay popcorn machine!

Navy Pier will be in the first few pages of every Chicago guidebook- right there in the "Must See" list. Here's the truth about Navy Pier: If you don't have children and you don't have hundreds of dollars to burn, it sucks. Navy Pier consists of these things: a ferris wheel, boats, overpriced food, suffocatingly large crowds of tourists, an IMAX theater, and bad shopping. Oh, and a huge stained glass exhibit(??) Whenever I take out-of-towners there, I immediately regret my decision because after an hour of being there, I remember how little there is to actually do. The only thing that is MAYBE worth doing is seeing the fireworks during the summer...but does anyone really care about fireworks that much? Screw the guidebooks- Navy Pier just ain't good.

It's always nice to be able to escape from hectic city life for an hour or two. Although the park is often as busy as the city itself, it's big enough that you can find a quiet spot to yourself and chill out. Or, on the contrary, if you're looking for excitement, there always seems to be some sort of event going on. Central Park has never really thrilled me, but it's nice to have as an option when you're feeling overhwelmed by concrete, steel, and honking taxis.

So I've always wanted to go to a midnight showing of "Rocky Horror" where they act it all out in front of the screen and you get to throw stuff and sing along. When I found out that the Chelsea Cinema has a WEEKLY midnight showing of the movie, I was there in a flash. Although I was totally pumped, I was honestly a little let down. Everybody knew each other, so it kind of reminded me of the stage crew kids from high school who would go around telling inside jokes, giggling, and trying to make you feel dumb for not knowing what they're talking about. The acting and staging were pretty well done, but because it was a weekly show, it was a little half-assed at times. I had a decent time, but I ain't goin' back.

Val is a crazy old lady who'll shout "Where've ya been for the last 37 years??" if you say you've never been to her record store before. She's loud and slightly intimidating, but she knows her stuff. She'll help you with what you need and if it's not in stock, she'll get it for you within a day or two. As a vinyl junkie, I adore this place. My only complaint is that the blues section is miniscule, but otherwise, this is an awesome place to load up on some LPs.

Taste of Lincoln Avenue is like a smaller-scale Taste of Chicago with a younger crowd and cooler things to do. This street festival, which takes place during the last weekend of July, doesn't focus solely on food. Local businesses sell their wares (edible or otherwise), there are midway games so you can try your luck, five stages that host over 40 musical acts, and there's even a bags tournament to compete in. Since Lincoln Park is a younger 'hood, you don't have to deal with screaming kids or old fogeys. The only catch is that, like any Chicago festival, the crowds are insane, so you might have to start throwin' elbows to cross the street.

Talk about overwhelming! If you were plopped down right in the middle of this place, you might actually think you're in China. The streets are always bustling with people, most of which are out to do their weekly shopping at the outdoor markets. This is definitely the place to go if you're into buying weird, unidentifiable foods, knock-off designer bags, or just some fresh groceries on the cheap. And, obviously, the restaurants here have the most authentic (and cheapest) Chinese food in all of New York City. A cool place to visit, for sure.

At Kingston Mines, you find yourself on the bayou, drinking a cool beer, listening to some quality tunes, and singing along to somebody's rendition of "Sweet Home Chicago." What could be better? Any trip to Chicago has to involve a trip to a blues club, so why not head to its oldest and most famous one? HUGE names have passed through this place, and for good reason. The atmosphere is awesome, the crowd is varied, dancing is encouraged, and the party goes on 'til 4am! Sounds like a little slice of heaven to me...

Astroland closed its doors in 2008, but the Cyclone lives on. This famous coaster made its maiden voyage in 1927 and is still going strong. It's a surprisingly intense coaster, actually. I decided to ride it after a near-fainting experience on the subway and it definitely perked me right up...along with my lunch. If you can muster up the strength to pay $8 to ride a roller coaster, you should. It's not only a tough little coaster, but it's a classic, and riding it is like becoming a part of history.

Since Astroland closed all of its rides besides the Cyclone, you're kind of stuck going to Deno's Wonder Wheel Park. Deno's is famous for its ferris wheel that was built in 1920 and has cars that slide back and forth down the spokes as you rotate. The rest of the park has a bunch of kiddie rides and a couple for adults, such as bumper cars and a ride-through funhouse of horror. Rides are expensive (about 5 bucks each) and the people are unfriendly, but what else can you do? I had a fun 20 minutes there, then I got the hell out. The Coney Island charm only lasts so long.

The appeal of Coney Island is that you can picture it in its heyday, with men in striped bathing suits and handlebar mustaches sitting on the beach, and women wearing pearls on ferris wheels. Now, it's more of a rundown, half-abandoned area run by carnies in trailers. But there's something about riding an octogenarian roller coaster or walking into a tent filled with "live freak animals" that still holds some magic for me. Brooklyn is currently trying to clean up this area and build a whole new theme park, so visit it now while it still has some shreds of old-school charm remaining.

The Upper West Side isn't exactly the nightlife capital of New York City, it seemed, but it is a pretty awesome place to hang out during the day. If you're a tourist, there's Central Park and the Museum of Natural History. If you're not, there's plenty of shopping, eating, and wandering to do. It's pretty swanky without being pretentious and, hey, I walked right by Alec Baldwin on my way to get some frozen yogurt. Nothing beats that.